Due to the current course that the government kindly pay for me to attend, I am in a High School in Liverpool observing Maths Classes this week. Therefore, it seems rude not to write eahc day to tell of the comments, weirdness and sheer brilliance that is certain to continue throughout.
Day 1 - Monday
First crazy child of the day demanded that I affirm his greatness at Maths, in particular his unparalleled skill at sketching graphs. As I deceptively nodded back, he began to grin, until he registered that i was saying that he was quite possibly the furtherst behind in the entire class and had produced simply the worst graph that was unreadable for any purpose, and then he grimaced. He then seemed to decide that this wasn't worth fighting, he sat upright and atested, "I'm like Batman". I bit, "How so?" I replied skeptically. He smugly responded, "Because I'm good Maths!". He caught me slighlty off guard. I gained my composure and mumured "Yes... Yes you are" and walked away.
Another child told me I look like Jamie Oliver. Compared to my usual James Corden comments, I was well pleased. So I began to strutt, which is probably why only 5 minutes later, a young scallywag from the back of the class requested, "Can I touch your hair Sir?" Confunded, i blurted, "Definately Not! ... And why would you want to do that anyway?" He started strong and tailed off as if he realised the ridiculous connotations of what he was now begging to do, "Because it looks ... good.". I completed the conversation with "Good. Carry on." and walked away.
Finally, one girl asked if she could "tie" me? Concerned, I squished up my facial features and asked "What?!?" She asked again while gesturing towards my tie and pretending to pull it from me. I backed off and "Who on earth would say yes to that?" and walked away.
It was a great day. Two of the girls at the end of the day even demanded a fist pump each from their new favourite 'hip' teacher! You know thats right!
In a bit. love J.
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