I'm Moving

After a great spell with the guys here at blogspot, it seems Tumblr is the place to be.

An after joinging a matter of days ago...I must agree.

So my new blogsite is www.thekissofchaos.tumblr.com

So if you follow follow. Then Follow The Kiss Of Chaos there from now!

It is easier to interact over at Tumblr. So if you have any questions or requests...Shoot!

For the final time. Love J.

Messy Theology!

Go Ahead. Mess Me Up!

The western world has found itself living under a certain set of precepts and mindsets that govern the very process of cognitive thought. The current post-modern trend has undoubtedly disrupted this learned behavior of so long.

One such example of this is the western desire or even necessity to pack it up and ship it off; by this I mean that this culture has demanded answers and absolutes to questions that intersect social structures and combat popular ideologies. Every tricky question must have an answer, we must find it, reveal it and then put it to bed, never to be woken, and it is upon that foundation that we will search for the next ‘truth’.

One of the reasons that postmodernism has spoiled this particular party is its outrageously empowering stance on free-thought and pluralism - via meta-narrative sub-thought. For all of its flaws and confusion, I would almost definitely not be writing or thinking these thoughts without its effect on contemporary society. (In particular its effect on Christendom)

All of this drivel to say that our learned behavior of placing answers in boxes, storing them away and tossing the key is abiblical. (If you have not learned by now that I make up words and guess at others, I’m not sure how to help you.) A typically eastern mindset would be opposing to this system of thought.

Eastern thought seems to advocate the development and addition of differing and opposing thought structures concerning the same specific topic and living within that tension. Key? What key? What box? Exactly! 

A good example of this would be eschatology in the Fourth Gospel. Many different scholars would claim to see glimpses of universalism, predestination, armeniesm or futurist thought in the Fourth Gospel. I think it is ridiculous for us with our western mindsets to demand that the writer or writers all had just one of these opinions and rejected the rest. I think it is likely that the writer/s held many of these thoughts within a tension and was content without feeling a need to commit to any one of these eschatological streams.  

One of my New Testament professors at college once said something that greatly helped me to develop my own theological thinking. He roughly said that we in a western mindset always place everything in boxes and are reluctant to question their validity, yet the eastern mindset has everything exploded within their mind and sets themselves at an appropriate position in that spiders web of thought. Remove these 2000 years and you will even closer to the necessary dismantlement to see through the eyes of the New Testament writers.

Basically, he said what I have expanded and explained in the previous chapters. Or that’s what I have held in my theological thought web tension ever since.

So, it seems to me that the messier your theology gets, the more exploded, intertwined, interspersed and knowledgeable it finds itself, the more you will stray from answers and long for collections of ideologies to live within and among. 

I have found this process utterly liberating.

In a bit. Love J.

This Theology. That Theology!

“I don’t have a theology”. Someone I met said this to me after I told them of my study of theology. They were and are wrong, maybe about most things, but definitely about this.

Theology isn’t something you can choose not to be part of, nor is it something that you cannot have. A personal theology, which is what most people refer to as their own system of belief, is something that rooted deep within every one of us, whether you like it or not.

Marcus Borg, an American theologian, tells of the many conversations that he has embarked on with many an Atheist; he begins the conversation with a simple question, “tell me about the God you don’t believe in?”. This is the crux of theology; the minute, nay, the second that they start to form a picture of God, they have entered into a personal theology.

The truth is that probably every one of us has at least a slightly different picture of God.

On any one Sunday morning service there may well and almost certainly will be several people sharing the same row, yet their differing views of God would be alarmingly contrasting.

Maybe there are Christians whose PoG would be more closely matched with certain strands of Judaism, Extremist Islam, Charitable Pro-Life Atheists or Old Men’s Social Clubs.

Whatever your personal view of God is, be assured that it does exist. Whether it is the picture of the God that you don’t care about, claim to follow, avidly protest against or attempt to please daily, it is your own theology that leads you to this structure of belief.

Theology affects us all.

What shaped your theology?

What challenges your theology?

Does it change? Why? How?

What could transform your theology?

Experience? Friends? The Bible? Despair?

In a bit. J.

School Craic - Part 3

Day 3

So there are many things to mention, however i will skip through them relatively quickly, since the trip home has overshadowed the day's craziness!

Ok, so today I got called 'James' too many time to count, guess the white shirt is a JC thang. Also got one Jack Black vote. the first clas of the day was incredible, since Sinead and I spent the hour getting to know Chris, who is fully blind. And one of the cleverest kids in the school, and also quite possibly the nicest and most sane and not in a socially awkward way, in a refreshing sort of 'have a laugh' way. he wrote our names in Braille for us, he showed us his maths learning kit (including 3D shapes, Raised graph paper with what look like fuzzy pipe things). He was amazing.

So, on the way home, Sinead and i were sitting on the train minding our own business sporadically chatting about whatever nonsense seemed appropriate. Until, 2 female (I think) train officers dressed in Yellow Hi-Vis jackets approached us. Put it this way, if yesterday I was the 'Computer Game Police' then these ladies were the 'Put your feet on the chairs Police'. They asked to see our tickets, Then continued to read us our rights, take our address, name and DOB, then asked questions like Why were you putting your feet on the chairs? Then they wrote a description of us down (yeah they're really going for it now, I'm smiling, Sinead has walked off by this point, after giving a fake address but her real name! lol). After all of that they took our signatures. Took a second to breath. And smiled and sat down, exasperating at how long the day had been and looking to me for affirmation. I didn't reciprocate.

So, after receiving a General Caution by the Train Officers and the promies of a cheeky letter through the post, they departed me. Ashton? What? Who the? Why?  Cornflakes?

one last note. I forgot to mention that one of the TA's yesterday 'accidently dressed as Minnie Mouse. And I am not talking about just the Red and White Dress with Black Belt, Shoes and Black Bead Necklace. She also had a Black and Red Headband. Unreal!

In a bit. love J.

School Dayz - Part 2

Hey Part 2 is here, as promised.

Today started with a pretty hectic yet unmajoreventfully with a Computer lesson. I was more like the 2D Flash Game Police rather than a Maths TA (which is basically what I am in other classes, actually the TA's do very little so thats not a great representation). I think I did impress one of the kids though with my aparently suprising detective work of discovering their games hanging in the taskbar. He even hid the bar, disguised the minimisation via tabs and full-screened the Maths program in an attempt to outfox me. He failed.

The second event worth mentioning started as I walked into a class pre-teacher and was greeted with various verbal assaults demanding to know the nature of my visit, my name and who I had come to see? One particular child shouted louder than the rest, so I thought he was a great place to start. i love a challenge and I love a bit of banta. I went over to him and told him that I had been sent to look after him for the rest of the day and report back at the end. He was alarmed and confused. It was at this point that the girl directly behind him mouthed his name to me, so i was then able to give my story some creditation by asking him if he was (lets call him...) Bryan Dobbins. This freaked him  out and he stood up and backed away trying to keep him cocky swagger. He failed. Had a good laugh with him later on, he was actually the best in the class. Well Palayed.

Got the James Corden today. Also got an old favourite - Sean Astin. Seems I attract famous lookalike Guesses.

Final Note. On the way home I dozed off for a second on the train, woke up to find some random woman taking a picture of me with her phone. Obviously i called her on it, to the girl i was with (Sinead). "for some reason this lady here is taking pictures of me?!" She laughed and claimed it wasn't. I addressed her, "If you wanted pictures, all you had to do is ask, I would have posed. (I turned to my friend) She must fancy me) She got off with her friend at the next stop. With my picture!

In a bit. love J.

School Observation - Day 1

Due to the current course that the government kindly pay for me to attend, I am in a High School in Liverpool observing Maths Classes this week. Therefore, it seems rude not to write eahc day to tell of the comments, weirdness and sheer brilliance that is certain to continue throughout.

Day 1 - Monday

First crazy child of the day demanded that I affirm his greatness at Maths, in particular his unparalleled skill at sketching graphs. As I deceptively nodded back, he began to grin, until he registered that i was saying that he was quite possibly the furtherst behind in the entire class and had produced simply the worst graph that was unreadable for any purpose, and then he grimaced. He then seemed to decide that this wasn't worth fighting, he sat upright and atested, "I'm like Batman". I bit, "How so?" I replied skeptically. He smugly responded, "Because I'm good Maths!". He caught me slighlty off guard. I gained my composure and mumured "Yes... Yes you are" and walked away.

Another child told me I look like Jamie Oliver. Compared to my usual James Corden comments, I was well pleased. So I began to strutt, which is probably why only 5 minutes later, a young scallywag from the back of the class requested, "Can I touch your hair Sir?" Confunded, i blurted, "Definately Not! ... And why would you want to do that anyway?" He started strong and tailed off as if he realised the ridiculous connotations of what he was now begging to do, "Because it looks ... good.". I completed the conversation with "Good. Carry on." and walked away.

Finally, one girl asked if she could "tie" me? Concerned, I squished up my facial features and asked "What?!?" She asked again while gesturing towards my tie and pretending to pull it from me. I backed off and "Who on earth would say yes to that?" and walked away.

It was a great day. Two of the girls at the end of the day even demanded a fist pump each from their new favourite 'hip' teacher! You know thats right!

In a bit. love J.

Optical Harassment!

There are many of you who will have heard this story already, but it seemed rude not to share with you in a lterary form that may be re-read and shared aloud.

It all began in late November, when I had started to get daily headaches that seemed to originate from my eyes. It was a weird feeling and this is the best description I can muster to convey such experiences. I decided that, due to the pain, it was necessary to visit an optician, which wasn't a difficult desicion, since I love tests and interactive exams.

I was on my way to Morisons for my bi-weekly food shop (I cannot explain how much I enjoy these occassions, so i will simply mention that Online grocery purchasing is the devil) and I spotted a 'Specsavers' in the same shopping complex. I strolled into the open fronted shop and was instantly greeted by a young blonde girl who was eager to assist me, I assumed that this was simply in reference to Eye-care, looking back on it I may have missed a trick. Ah well, had I engaged in intrapersonal flirtatious communications, i may not have this same story to tell.

The attractive blonde girl informed me that a basic eye examination was 5 pounds and there was an appointment free in 5 minutes if i cared to wait. I couldn't believe my luck, only 5 pounds and timing had favoured me perfectly, so I sat. After 5 minutes of trying to avoid watching a family dispute while still avidly following the progress of said debacle, I was called over and ushered into a small under-lit room with a desk and a poor-mans excuse of a dentistry chair.

The lady that greeted me was approximately thirty years old, of asian persuasion and still reading the 'smiling for dummies' yellow book. I sat on the beige fake leather chair awaiting the excitement of an eye-test. I attempted to lighten the inevitably starined mood between client-professional relationship with a couple of light-hearted quips. To say they were'nt received well would imply that they were acknowledged in the first place. They weren't. Eventually the 'special' glasses were finished with, the 'red or green' part was also over and all that remained was to shine the torch into my eyes, close-up.

Did she turn the light back on? No, of course not. It was pitch black with no screens on any longer. She crept over to me, lowered the chair and delibertaly stood with her left leg in between my two legs and the other outside my right leg. This striked me as unusual. She then began to look into my eye, instantly my eyes began to stream (I am ridculously sensetive to light), She asked me to look in every direction (Up...Up to the left...Left....Down to the...etc.), yet there was a suprising amount of time elapsing between each new command. However, there were other more pressing things, literally! Although I would not call this lady overweight, she was by no means slim and she was so close to me by now that I was being "treated" to a sample of her petruding anatomy. This became less of a situation when she took it one step further and began to caress my nose with hers, i couldn't be sure wether it was accidental until the fourth time when I obviously flinched backwards. This caused her to finish with the light and with no further words, light consumed the room once again.   

I was left floundering, I was in two minds whether to mention that i had just had mye eyes tested by an amateur Masseuse (can't be bothered looking up if that is the right spelling) and a poor one at that, but before I could even contemplate this desicion I saw her there staring at me from behind the reception area. i left promptly.

She told me I needed glasses full-time.
I went to tescos for a free eye-test.
They told me they could be useful when in over-lit situations of looking at a screen.
I have glasses and this story. All for £20. (Glasses were £15)

In a bit. Love J.